Through the Lifestream: Of Birth and Death
by Abialla
Summary: Soon...
1. Prologue: No Reset on Life

**This is a sequel to my first story: Through the Planet: Of Earth and Gaia. Please read that first before starting this one. Rate M because I haven't decided yet where this will go, so I figured I'd play it safe since my first was M. Enjoy!**

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No matter how many times she tries to push it out of her mind, it keeps coming back to haunt her. The same image of a fading face. A bright atmosphere dims to a faintly illuminated forest. Yet, every detail remains a blur behind tear filled eyes. And every time she wakes up from the same dream, the same nightmare, the same memory, the visions never truly disappear from her sight. Her heart aches from the torment that those events brought her almost 2 years ago. If not for the sound of a baby crying in the other room, she would have spent that night awake. Just another night in her never ending struggle with insomnia would pass as it always does in this strange world. Every night since meteor fall...

Sam slips out of bed, taking a deep breath as she makes her way towards the wailing sounds of her son. As she picks him up from his crib, cradling him ever so gently in her arms, she coos him quietly. "Now, now, Kaden." She whispers, "It was just a dream. Only a dream." She seems to say this more to herself than to her son as she kisses him gently upon his crown. His cries begin to soften from her touch and voice. With only sniffles and a few hiccups left, she walked with him to the kitchen. There, she opened her fridge and grabbed a bottle, placing it into the microwave a few feet away to warm the milk and formula inside. Listening to the soft whirring of the machine, Sam sways slightly with Kaden in her arms, humming a sweet tune to her tired and hungry child. She was tired, too. What she wouldn't give to have just one night of restful sleep. So long as those memories remain, however, she can't help but feel she'll never catch a wink. At least not as long as her son remains in her life. _He looks so much like him_...she ponders to herself as she continues her tune, lightly petting the few wisps of silver hair atop his head.

Just as her mind begins to wander once more to the night the meteor fell, the buzzer of the microwave goes off, alerting her of the freshly warmed milk. She grabs it quickly, cradling Kaden in her other arm, deftly twisting the bottle with her single free hand so that the nipple faces the adjoining wrist, giving it a slight squeeze to check the temperature. Just right. She spins the bottle back around and offers it to her child before a new set of tears can form in his eyes. He accepts it graciously as he drinks from it with fervor. She sighs as he drinks and sits down on the nearest chair. "You're getting too big for this." Kaden had grown quite a bit in the past year and a half since he was born. His weight was beginning to come down on Sam only a month prior each time she'd hold him. "Soon, I won't even be able to give you that bottle anymore." She lightly caresses her pinky across his button size nose while still keeping hold of his bottle. _I'm not looking forward to that "terrible two" year I've heard some much about._ Her mind drifts as she ponders her son's growth. _If it's his son we're talking about, I can picture some pretty destructive behavior in the future._ She groans and furrows her brow as she imagines oncoming messes.

With his belly full and happy, Kaden falls asleep peacefully in his mother's arms once more. Sam doesn't hold back a sigh of relief as she replaces the mostly empty bottle back in the fridge and walks him back to his crib. After lying him down gently and covering him with his blanket, she tiptoes back to her own just across the small hallway. She immediately falls into bed to try to sleep some more. Alas, to no avail. She's too awake. After a few minutes of turning around and around, trying to find that one spot that will allow her to drift, she eventually gives up and rises back up out of bed. She crosses the room to turn on the lamp at her desk, upon which sat a journal. She stares at it for a few minutes as memories begin to flood her mind once more...

 _"Who are you? How do you-" A frightening voice speaks so closely._

 _"Please" A mere whisper in my ear._

 _"Sam," I could hear his yearning...for me... "when we are this close, I find nothing else matters." I could feel his caress that tips me over the edge._

 _"I promise, I will come back for you...the both of you. I swear it...I will never be a memory. I will return, and you will be mine again."_

She pushes back the tears that form, finding herself already sat in her desk chair, the journal flipped to the very page she doesn't want to look at. Yet, there it is, as clear as day. Five simple words etched into the paper and an initial signed just below.

I will always love you.

S

That was the last page he had written in this journal. There were other pages within that bore strange writings in a language she's never seen before. She never paid them any mind though. All she could find herself doing was reading through _his_ entries, over and over again. A few pages he started were of short statements describing his dreams. For her, it was incredible to see the change in handwriting through each submission. She felt as if she were watching him grow up from a child to the man she fell in love with. It made her feel that much closer to him, even though he was no longer there. Eventually, since finding his journal that fateful day, on the ground next to her in the Sleeping Forest, she began writing within it her own story. It was the same story, shadowing his style but from her own perspective of all that played out when she first arrived in Gaia.

Sam flips to the last page she wrote upon. This is where his story ended, but hers continued. He had no way of writing anything anymore once his final battle with Cloud began, leaving her with that small message to remember him by, and a promise within it. Picking up her pen, she begins once more writing her experiences during her time on Gaia, recalling what she can from her journey to the Northern Crater one last time where her life shattered into a million pieces. While the old Sam was hardly a hero, this current one leaves something to be desired: her heart.


	2. Kyo's Help

"Sam!...Sam, open up! I know you're home!" Kyo's incessant knocking finally gets to Sam's nerves as she lazily makes her way to the front door. When the door swings open, she can't help but cringe back from the cold sweeping into her home. "You're always home."

"Can we please not start this again?" Sam drones out monotonously, hoping her lack of interest in the topic that would undoubtedly ensue would cause him to drop it before he began. Alas, it is not to meant to be as she closes the front door, watching him make his way into her home as he would his own.

Shaking the snow off his parka, he turns to her and responds with his questioning glare, "How can I not?" She felt herself cringe again, only this time not from the weather, but from the ice in his eyes. "It's been over a year now. Closing in on two! I'm going to keep coming in here until you get out."

She averts her eyes as she answers him, "It-it's too cold outside. I don't like the cold."

While that wasn't entirely false, she knew that wasn't the reason, but she'd never admit to it. Kyo, on the other hand, had no problems voicing her thoughts for her, reading her like an open book, "If that were the case you never would have made a home in Icicle Inn. It's _always_ cold here!" She flinches as his voice raises. She tries to shush him gently so he wouldn't wake up Kaden, but he doesn't stop, "Don't ssshhhh me! I'm tired of seeing you like this. Remember when I told you back in Shinra that I would protect you?" She nods a little, "Well I am keeping that promise, even if it means I have to protect you from yourself." She looks at him incredulously, she hasn't done anything to herself. Mistaking his words as him insinuating some form of self-mutilation, she opens her mouth to respond, but gets cut off before she can form a word, "Have you even looked in a mirror? You look like you just went through another of Hojo's experiments." That hit a soft spot. Her face contorts in pain as she recalls all the torture she had gone through inside that lab. She supposed she hasn't been eating much, probably lost a lot of weight. She could only imagine what her skin must look like, losing all color having not been outside once since moving to her new home.

Kyo notices the torment in her eyes as he calms down and steps toward her. He places both hands on her shoulders and squeezes gently. She can feel his warmth as his forehead reaches her own, resting there as he whispers, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. It's just, you had such a light in your eyes when I first met you. You had so much energy back then, before he-...before the meteor fell. I just...I just wish you could show _me_ that light."

Before she knew it, the tears fell freely from her eyes as memories flooded her mind again. This time, however, it was a little bit easier for her to cope as she felt Kyo's strong arms surround her. She'd never once felt any sort of sexual affection towards him, but she knew she could always count on him, like a big brother always watching over.

The tender moment was broken though to the sounds of a crying toddler. Sam's the first to break away from the embrace so that she can tend to her son. Sam follows briskly behind as they make their way into the nursery. It was a small room, with colored walls filled with pictures of rainbows, animals, and cute shapes and patterns. Inside the crib that sat in the very center of the room was a very fussy Kaden. Sam picks him and coddles him to her chest, bouncing and swaying slightly to ease his tantrum. Patting his back with his head over her shoulder, she hears the satisfying burp that lets her know that milk he had earlier finally came back up to say hi. She couldn't help but give a small giggle as he himself laughed at the sound.

"There it is." Sam whispers while smiling gently in her direction, watching her facial expressions intently.

"Hmm?" She turns to look at him, not hearing what he muttered.

"Never mind." He just shook his head and turned to leave the room, seeing as his help was not needed in that moment. Sam follows after him, Kaden in tow, before reaching the room they were just in when they had their 'discussion.' After putting Kaden down to allow him to wander the room, Kyo begins to speak again.

Sam raises her hand and cuts him off just as he opens his mouth. It's her turn to say her peace, "Listen, Kyo. I understand you're worried, and I get that. But despite what you think, my focus is on Kaden. I'm not just wandering around moping all damn day. Being a mother is a full time job if you weren't aware."

"I'm aware, but I also know you never sleep." He says matter-of-factly, sitting down on the couch nearby, watching her expression change from his words.

"Wh-...Have you been spying on me?" Her eyes couldn't grow any wider from the thought, but he snuffs out the fire that was beginning to brew inside her.

He couldn't help but smirk. "Hardly," He remembers a conversation they had a long time ago. She explained how she thought he was a perverted creeper bent on bedding her. While he was most certainly attracted to her, and didn't quite know how to act around women who made him feel such a way, he would hardly ever even think of acting on such disgusting impulses. He thinks how nice it is to hear that she still feels that way about him: sarcastically, of course. "I think you forgot that I work the night watch in town, keeping away any stray monsters left over. Whenever I pass by your house, your bedroom light is still on, throughout the entire night...what are you doing all that time?"

She just sits down on the couch next to him and sighs at his worried look, "Writing, mainly."

"About?"

"My time here. My thoughts." He sits there silently, waiting for her to continue, "I write about everything that's happened to me. I think...deep down, I'm hoping that if I just get my memories down on paper, they'll stop haunting my mind so frequently. That maybe that journal will just absorb it all from me like a sponge." She stares at the ground, finally voicing this to somebody for the first time, she realizes how crazy she must sound, "I'm just being ridiculous, huh?"

Kyo just shakes his head, letting a small smile form on his lips, "Not at all." He responds warmly to her, "It's certainly progress from when we first moved here. You would do nothing but stare at a wall. Once Kaden was born though, I've seen a lot of progress from you. You'll get over this. And I'll help in any way that I can." He takes her hand in his and squeezes, letting her know that he was there for her.

She smiles a little at his touch and his words. She felt a little relief, but not enough to rid her of her tormenting memories. "That might be true," her smile slowly fades as she continues, "but I still feel like my mind has made no progress at all. I can function, sure, but it never goes away. I'm not sure I'll ever heal from this." She feels another tear roll down her cheek when a small voice calls out to her.

"Mama..." She looks over to the source of the word and spies her son staring up at her, holding onto the couch cushion next to her for balance. He looks up at her with big sad eyes, empathising with his mother's depressed state. Sam inhales sharply from the sight and and quickly removes her hand from Kyo's hold. She knows how her mood can affect her child, and with that knowledge she quickly replaced her frown with a smile as she wraps her hands around his little torso. Lifting him up to her, Kaden's mood also changes to match his mother's new expression. Sighing slightly with relief, she holds him close in a hug with Kaden wrapping his own arms around her neck. "You're all I have left of him," she whispers to him, though more to herself, "Mother will always cherish you. Don't ever forget that."

Kyo, watching on at this tender moment, begins to feel uncomfortable as a bystander. He can't quite grasp why, but something about knowing whose son Sam is holding creates a small pang in his chest. As Sam closes her eyes, enjoying the brief serenity her son brings her, Kyo quietly stands up from the couch to leave the living room. She notices, however, and calls out to him. Just as he reaches the door he turns back to her and gives her a small smile. "I didn't want to ruin your moment."

She proceeds to rise from the couch, Kaden still in her arms, and approaches Kyo. "I'm sorry...for worrying you." She looks him directly in the eye, giving a small smile, showing him that she will be fine even if she doesn't believe it herself. His smile widens a bit in return and turns back to the door to leave. The cold air from outside rushes in again before the door closes shut, leaving Sam and Kaden alone once more. She lets out a small sigh as she stares at the door for a moment before turning to bring Kaden back to his room. Before she could get far, though, the front door swings open again and the cold air blows in, freezing her to the bone. She quickly holds Kaden closer to her and shields her child from the chilling wind. "What the-?!"She nearly curses from the surprise temperature change.

"Sorry!" Kyo exclaims as he closes the door once more behind him and steps into the house again.

Sam swings around to see him standing inside her house, tracking snow onto her carpet again all too soon. "Kyo! What the hell?" Kaden starts crying due to his mother's angry voice and the tight grasp she had on him. "I thought you were leaving." She breathes as she attempts to calm herself down as well as her son, bouncing and swaying to quell his frustrations.

"I know, I was. I just nearly forgot why I came here in the first place."

"You mean it wasn't to lecture me about my 'poor health habits'?" She raises an eyebrow as she asks sarcastically.

"No...I mean...a little. But it was supposed to lead to something. And...ugh, it just didn't go to plan, clearly."

"clearly..." Sam blankly states in response.

Exasperated, Kyo begins again, "Listen, the reason I came here in the first place was to give you something to do outside of the house."

"Kyo, we already talked about this. I don't have any time for hobbies." She shakes her head before he could explain and turns away from him, taking a few steps back towards Kaden's bedroom.

"It's not a hobby. It's aiding others." She stops midstep and turns back to him, giving him her full attention. "There are people who came into town. They need some help. I figured with your...erm...abilities, who better suited for it then you?"

She looks down at her free hand, almost ashamed of what she is. From the protective magic he had given her back at the Northern Crater, to the strange experiments Hojo conducted on her, then finally, to top it all off, spending so much time within the Lifestream, certain changes had manifested themselves within Sam. Ever since...the time of meteor fall...she could only assume it was all of those events added together that allowed her to use magic without the use of materia. It was strange the first time she learned of this new skill. Only a year ago, a poor widow in Icicle Inn had lost her husband to the Geostigma. Sam was already settled in her own home with her son already born when the old woman wandered the streets with a bout of Geostigma herself. In her distress from the nightmares, Sam sought out the woman in hopes of contracting the Midgar disease and succumbing to its wrath, allowing death to bring her a sweet release from the persistent mental torment. But no such relief came. Instead, when Sam had touched the widow, the Geostigma disappeared from the elder's skin. It was a miracle. But to Sam, it was also a curse. No Cure materia could do what she did. So why could she? What was she? What has she become?

Still staring at the hand that had touched that woman a year prior, recalling the event that took placed, she finally tears her eyes away from her palm to look at Kyo again. He stands there quietly with a small bit of hope shining in his eyes. She sighs quietly, giving in to the puppy dog look, and nods her head slightly. "Ok...I will help."


	3. Keep on the lookout

...


End file.
